New Year's Resolution (a little late)

In order to understand why I started this blog one must understand some of the journey of the past year and understand how I got the point I am now.

This whole journey started back in January whenever the school I work at was creating a Biggest Loser type contest. I decided to join after some of my friends at school thought it would be fun. At the time I did not think I had a problem, I just had a few extra pounds.

The first weigh in came around and I got on the scale and was shocked out of my mind. I looked down and saw 272 pounds. I never thought I was that overweight. That was the moment my New Year's Resolution started-- I wanted to lose 90 pounds. I was realistic in not achieving that this year but over the course of 2-3 years.

Over the course of a few weeks I started losing the weight. It started out very easy-- I lost 20 pounds within a month. I was feeling better than I had in a long time, I had more energy than before. I lost the weight with only changing my diet and eating less and limiting myself to about 1 soda a day. The next month I lost about 10 pounds by starting to add in exercising after school through Hip Hop Abs. 

But things did not stay that easy for much longer. The stress of school started to kick in towards the end of the year and I seemed to hit a plateau. I was no longer losing but actually started going up a few pounds. I did not know what was wrong. By the end of May I had gone down to 241 pounds. But by the end school ended I was back up to 246 pounds.

I was frustrated and wanted to throw the scale out the window. I hated it, I hated exercising, I hated food. I was blaming everything and anyone. I wanted to give in and throw in the towel and give up.

But my attitude started to turn around the last day of school for teachers. I was sitting with other teachers on the deck of a restaurant and realized that is what life was about. Life is hard, it is meant to be hard otherwise we would be in heaven already. The pain and suffering, the trials and tribulations are part of life. They help us to realize we are alive.

Since that afternoon I have tried to have a new attitude. I have realized that the number on the scale is just that, a number. I have lost about 10 pounds since ending school but the number fluctuates so much that any given day I could have lost or gained. What is more important than that number is that I feel better than I have and I look good- haha. I feel like a million bucks. So I really do not need the scale to change (even though I would really like it to change).

Life is hard. Life is full of pain. And at time life sucks. But the great part is that you feel something-- you can make it through it, you can survive. So in the end -- life is fun, life is a journey to help discover who you are.

This summer so far has been a truly eye opening time-- I have realized so many things about myself since I do not spend so much time eating. I have rediscovered movies and the fun I have with them. I have discovered that my friends are great people and I that I really stopped having a life over the past two years. I think a big part of it was I was embarrassed with myself.

I have discovered that going out with people is so much better than going out by yourself. I am figuring out I really am a people person and enjoy being around people.

I am now exercising 2-3 times a day and eating better than I ever have. I have even created a new goal since the beginning of the year. I want to look like Ryan Reynolds by the time I am 30 years old. Goals do not need to be realistic-- they need to be something to work towards.

One of my good friends told me I should consider writing a blog and be inspiration to other people. But I do not consider myself inspirational. I am writing this blog to help other people realize, there are others out there going through difficulties.

BUT the main reason I am doing this is that weekly I am going to post a blog on a healthy dish I made and share with others so they can see that there are GREAT foods out there that taste amazing and are actually healthy. I do not cook much but this will make me cook at least ONE meal a week to share with whoever decides to read it.

I will also post little things I learned about myself, life, exercising, etc. I hope you decide to come with me on this journey I have embarked on. A journey of discovering oneself and what makes them tick. A journey of figuring out that food does not have to control you but that you control it. But most importantly a journey of learning to love yourself because until you do that you will never find happiness and we all deserve happiness!!